I 've been feeling very weird today, you see.. After years and years of being independent and self-sufficient I can't quite feel comfortable relying on someone other than myself.
Yesterday I escaped a castastrophe. While making my long commute to work in heavy rains one of the wiper blades on my car tried to escape! The blade came out of the bracket, got tangled between the "arms" and then the arms managed to cross and hook themselves together at the worst possible time.
Call it what you will, luck or guardian angels; it happened right after I had switched to the right lane of the highway, being overly cautious and switching lanes long before my exit. I was lucky to be able to pull onto the shoulder while blinded by the heavy curtain of rain and not be one more casualty of yesterday's bad weather-induced wreckage.
Anyways, one tow truck, and two hours later I finally made it to work. What came after was a hefty bill for the repairs plus a spinning head trying to decide exactly how to pay for it My husband, less stressed (and I guess conscious that no bodily injuries, only car repairs, was a blessing) had no problem offering one of his credit cards. Cha-ching!!
Not that I won't be contributing to paying for the repair cost, but having someone to share burdens still feels strange. I've been jokingly calling my husband my Sugar Daddy (to his amusement), thankful that WE (as a couple) have the means to take care of the unexpected, but mostly because I am having a hard time accepting that my husband took responsibility for ME.
I can't help but feel like some type of a slacker, almost incapable and having to rely on others for my welfare. Despite the few years together with my husband I have stayed pretty independent. We each take care of our own debts so allowing him to step in and make the decision made this proud/self sufficient woman feel a bit off balance.
I know we are a team now, and in the spirit of it while my car was in at the shop I had them look in to another repair I've been postponing. My husband was equally quick to insist they do it all. So despite my uneasy feeling I am happy not to be all on my own any more. If calling my husband my Sugar Daddy makes him feel "manly" for taking care of me while I deal with my independent notions, then he SHOULD get a kick out of it.