Wedding Photos

Wedding Photos

Monday, February 27, 2012

Patience Grasshopper!!

One of the biggest challenges in a marriage is having patience with your spouse.  As  easily as my husband can fly off the handle with other people's driving and a number of things he often gripes about that drive him mad he is quite patient with me.  I have an irritating tunnel vision once I set my mind on something getting done.  You see, I often mention my desire to do something/chore "some time soon" and will talk about it  for days, put it off for a long time until I drive myself crazy and must do it IMEDIATELY!!  Right then and there!  No more procrastinating, must get it done before my feet dragging comes and bites me in the butt! Of course my must do it NOW (or freak out moment) usually makes my husband suffer! Being the smart man that he is he knows it is best to jump on board during those nutty outburst than to become a casualty!

Take for instance the carpets being cleaned this weekend.  They have been looking pretty bad for a couple of months!  I had every intention of cleaning them before hosting our last gathering but there was no time to do it.  Since I have talked about renting a machine and cleaning the carpets ourselves.  We've had a number of things going on every weekend and during the week there is no time or honestly ENERGY to take on any "project" around the house. 

Yesterday afternoon I finally snapped! We have invited family over for dinner next weekend so it was NOW OR NEVER time!!   I pestered my husband since early in the afternoon about running to pick up a machine but he didn't get around to it until later in the day.  He belly ached for EVER about being Sunday, and tried to "reason" with me in to leaving the chore for a Saturday, basically the usual stalling to any  house work.  I am not a clean freak, I have to make myself keep up with house chores and unfortunately when it comes to house cleaning I must take the lead because my husband can ignore/put off things far longer than I can.

Anyway, he finally brought home the rental carpet cleaner and offered to work the machine himself in an effort to keep me from injuring my poor back (I've had a pain free couple of months).  Well, the good deed was too good to be true.  I am convinced that either my husband had really never worked a carpet cleaner before or he suddently asked himself "how the heck did I get stuck doing this?" Without going in to more details I ended up cleaning the carpets. 

I won't imply that he wiggled out of doing the carpets, it was more of me taking ownership of my disfunctional need to DO IT RIGHT!  I was very concious not to nag him about doing it "como sus patas" (a half assed job), and just took over.  He did help by emptying the dirty water and refilling the machine for me, but that was another "patience grasshopper" moment for me.  He first staretd to head to the kitchen sink to dump out the water and I asked him to dump it in the bathroom afraid to clog up the sink aside from the ick factor.  I didn't think I would have to give specific instructions (he squints his eyes at me and I swear he is thinking "I am squashing your head" as his eyes become thin slits), but I was wrong!!  My HUSBAND dumped the water in to the bath tub.  Hello??  How is that different from the kitchen sink??  I had thought it would be without saying that the water should be dumped in the comode but I was wrong!!  Of course I didn't notice what he had done or the damage until late at night, past our bed time, when I tryed to take a quick shower after all the dusting, vacumming and carpet cleaning that evening. 

I confess to wanting to "colgarlo del palo mas alto!!" (hang him from the tallest pole!) I drew the shower curtain and found a black tub with all sorts of debry.  I did manage not to  scream too loud!!  Again, I won't reveal what was said only that I had to excersise all the patience I could at 11:30 p.m. I ended up spending a good 20 minutes scrubbing and as I feared unclogging the drain.  Yes, my husband insisted he would do it but I was so angry that I chose to do it myself AGAIN and this time I had to also get him out of my sight by closing the door on him before I lost it!  I knew if I let him do it he would try to do it quickly just to get to bed and I would probably go crazy wondering if he disinfected the tub well! 

When I asked him why he didn't dump the water down the comode his responce was, I didn't think about it!  No disrespect, but truly an Aggie moment!!  I had to calm myself down and remind myself of  how I didn't think about it either the time when I threw some dried up flowers down the garbage disposal   In my mind it was a grinder, an "indoor woodchipper" and never did the thought of getting the garbage disposal stuck cross my mind.  HE was very patient then!  So I scrubbed the tub and sucked it up, because I was not going to spew angry words and make a bad situation worse by turning it in to a monster fight!  Patience Grasshopper!!!

Monday, February 20, 2012

Over the hill to grandma's house...

Actually, "a short drive south to the border".  I've mentioned that my maternal grandmother lives in Laredo.  This week after receiving a birthday card in the mail from her my husband suggested we drive for the day and visit her on Sunday. 

It's the little things that my honey does that make me appreciate the man I married.  It's been a few months since we saw her last and though I talk to her once or twice a week during my commute home, the offer to go see her was a wonderful gesture from my husband.

Grandma is relatively young and her mind is probably sharper than mine!  We are very fortunate to still have her (my only living grandparent). I am very close to my grandmother.  I like to tell people why my grandma's opinion matters so much to me.  She has an incredible sense about people and so over my lengthy single years I introduced her to a couple of boyfriends.  Most of the time she liked them, or more accurately she didn't dislike them.  I would ask her opinion. "Que te parese?" (What do you think?) and her usual response was "No esta mal" (He is not bad!)

There were a few occasions when she absolutely did not like the men I dated and she wasn't afraid to tell me.  Once I was so disappointed and hurt about how blunt she was I didn't talk to her for weeks.  I later tried to smooth things over with her telling myself she was wrong and ignored her advice.  Well you can guess how that turned out.  Heartbreak, disappointment, shame; and despite how awful I felt my grandmother knew exactly how to comfort me.  After one particular failed relationship my grandmother told me the wises words... "Lo bailado, nadie te lo quita."  the phrase is hard to translate.  It literally translates to no one can take away from you what you've danced.  A better translation is no one can take away from you the good times you did have.

I have used that comforting line on those dear to me getting over a breakup and the laugh they get knowing that was grandma's advice is as healing as any hug. 

I remember asking my grandmother what she thought of my husband when she first met him, and I never really got an answer, you see... She first met him when she and my mother flew back from a trip to Chicago.  My honey went with me to pick them up at the airport.  He was such a great help; my grandmother is in a wheelchair and the woman does not know how to travel light. We drove them to my mother's from the airport and my honey was wheeling grandma in the house.  I was holding the door open and looked away for a second looking back to make sure mom did not try to unload any of the heavy suitcases on her own.  When I turned back around my honey was bench pressing grandma!!

He had been backing grandma in the house in her wheelchair and pulled on the chair hard to get the tires over a bump when his "chancla" (flip-flop) slipped and he fell back, pulling grandma in her wheelchair on top of him.  When I turned to look at them again I didn't see grandma's face but her orthopedic shoes up in the air!!  It took a while to register; by the time my eyes made their way down to the floor my honey's face was beat red as he strained to speak "pull her up".

He was angry at me for just a moment before he felt embarrassed, because what might have taken me a couple of seconds to asses what had transpired probably felt to him like several minutes and then the realization that he had tipped over my grandmother set in.

We got grandma upright again and my honey could not apologize enough; of course grandma was just mortified!! To her the inconvenience she felt she was and almost crushing my honey was unbearable.  So much for first impressions.  I love telling that story!  Being the smart ass that I am and having a sick sense of humor, I enjoyed very much telling my in-laws how their son had dropped my grandmother.  The look on their face and watching my honey squirm at the memory has been priceless.

So we are on our way to visit grandma today.  I know my husband will be quietly reliving that first meeting as well as grandma, and this sick woman laughing at those thoughts!

Thursday, February 16, 2012

In search for gifts..

You know how some people stress out over buying the right gift?  I definitely know.  Sometimes trying to find that perfect gift turns in to torture!  This year I gave myself plenty of time to shop and had the best time searching for Valentine's gifts for my honey, but it was torture not being able to run home and give him the gifts before the holiday.  I was so glad that I did my shopping early because having to deal with a sick spouse days prior to Valentine's Day didn't leave me much time or desire to step out of the house!

Anyways, I thought I'd share pictures of some of the gifts I got my nerd -- uhmm, I meant MY LOVE!  Nerd attracts nerd; so I know exactly where to shop!
Octopus mug, tentacles and a Cylon.

I will let you in on my pet name for my husband.  I call him "Pulpo" (octopus), for obvious reasons but in case you need it spelled out: he is very grabby!

Taking a picture of the box it came in was easier..

I found him this gag mug with an octopus inside.  I didn't really surprise him with the mug, but with me getting HIM coffee in the morning.  He is usually the one who brings me coffee in an effort to get my shuffling feet and sleepy/blind navigating self going in the morning! 

I thought the finger tentacles would make his sneak attacks more fun and who doesn't like "finger puppets"?

"Mi Pulpo" - My octopus!

The Cylon was was a big hit!  It's a Christmas ornament I scored in a clearance sale. It is battery operated and "it speaks". He's been playing with it hoping he doesn't or probably hoping he does get on my last nerve with it.  But like anyone who buys a kid a noisy toy, I was well aware of  the risk of being driven insane! 

The rest of his Valentine's day gift was less childish; Valentine cards and a gift certificate towards a new pair of cowboy boots. 

Oh and as for my birthday/Valentine gifts, I got a CD I've been wanting and a gorgeous ring I've had my heart set on from James Avery. I may be a nerd, but I am a girl first and my husband doesn't forget that!  Jewelry always makes this woman happy!  

Sunday, February 12, 2012


The honey and I are more than fortunate in that we generally enjoy good health. In the few years we've been together I can remember only one time other than this last week when my husband has been "sick". We aren't whiny people.  When we get a bit under the weather, we take care of ourselves by some simple over the counter treatments (for me a holistic remedy) and rest.  That's it, that's all!! 

There is our usual retreat, and I say OUR because we act in a similar way.  We want to be left alone, we try to contain germs or  viruses if any in one room and hopefully be able to quickly  "shake" whatever it is.  For the most part we are successful, except this last time the honey gave me a bit of a scare. His rare "under the weather" moment turned in to a four day stint. 

Whatever it was "it" knocked my honey completely off his feet!  A little scary for me because there were no real symptoms other than feeling weak for a couple of days followed by a couple more with high fevers and later some coughing. I kept trying to take him to the doctor, but being as stubborn as I am he refused and insisted it wasn't serious and would soon shake it.

I got a little scared with the continuous fevers, doubting how to help like many of us I accessed my primary source of information for these cases.  No, it was not the Internet; it was a call to good old "been thru it" MOM!  On my way to the grocery store to pick up a few things to help my honey I called "Mamacita" to share what was going on and pick her brain.  Mainly to make sure my "game plan" was reasonable and get some reassurance of when I should stop indulging my husband and force him to see a doctor. 
It almost took a jackhammer to open this package.

I got some good advice from Mom but also a lecture the length of half my ride to the grocery store over not owning a thermometer.  "How could I not own one?  Such an important tool in every household!"  Perhaps it is because we do not have children and like I said, we enjoy relatively good health that it really never crossed my mind to have one on hand.  "How could I have not asked her for one?"  Having worked for a medical supply company Mom supplied family and friends with different items at "cost" for years! For the record I did intend to buy a thermometer before I even phoned mom, in fact mentioning the need of the purchase prompted the lecture.

Anyways, the honey did manage to finally shake that bug on "his own".  It took much longer than 
usual, and his refusal for actual medical attention only subjected him to my home remedies.  Not only did he endure a couple of my "witches brews" as he likes to call them; but also one ice bath (to quickly lower his temperature), actually it was just a lukewarm bath that had my honey screaming and discussing the migration of "his boys".  I think next time he might consider less torture for one quick doctor visit.

Friday, February 10, 2012

Born on Valentine's Day

Only the people who are born on a "major" holiday can relate to the downside of having a birthday that competes with a celebration.

When I was a kid my family moved around a lot (being always the new kid in class) so my birthday celebration rarely included friends, only family members.  As a teen it always turned out that I didn't have a special someone when my birthday came around and my friends were usually busy with their own little boyfriends or girlfriends to celebrate with me.

As an adult things only got worse!  I was either in NO relationship making Valentine's day even harder to swallow or I was in a less than meaningful relationship making it awkward for both parties. 

I've never had a problem with getting another year older, just the extra attention (or lack of it) the holiday brings. Sadly it wasn't until my 38th birthday, the first with my honey after having been dating for about 6 months that I truly got to experience Valentine's Day!

I was "in love" for a change on my birthday, not just casually dating someone.  I went out with excitement and searched for a perfect card and gift for my love and could not wait to see the expression on his face. 

My Valentine took me out to a wonderful dinner for my birthday, got me a well thought out gift showing he was paying attention to my interests AND he also got me Valentine's gifts!  Candy and something sexy from Victoria's Secret. I could not have been happier, except...  Except Fate is a sick bitch with a sense of humor as morbid as mine!!!  She gave me for my 38th birthday back pain in the form of 3 compacted disks on my lower back!

On the morning of my birthday as I was getting out of my car: my arms heavy with purse, travel mug, files I had taken home to work on, and a few Valentine's day goodies for my coworkers; I attempted to "swiftly" step out of my car and instead encountered a sharp pain that almost made me drop everything!!  My first thought was "I pulled a muscle"!  I made it up to my office with increasing pain with each step I took.  By lunch time I was having trouble standing.

I met my honey for dinner that evening and by then I had by far exceeded the daily dosage for ibuprofen. Me, the person who hates to take pills and only takes them as a last resort!!  I couldn't stand up straight and could barely walk!

I could go on with a detailed account of the weeks that followed, but the short version is that it was a horrible painful week before I could get any real relief.  My honey spent my birthday weekend with me mostly laying on the floor (because that was the least painful position) watching movies and tending to me. 

He helped me walk up and down from my third floor apartment, dress, in/out of bed in the middle of the night and even went with me to the doctor.  Despite the pain it had been the best Valentine's day/birthday I had spent with a boyfriend!  I got to see the type of man he was/is.  When I had been disappointed by others lack of love/romance on my birthday I was shown what a great person I was now in love with!

We have now celebrated a few Valentine's days together, but our first I will never forget!

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Tag team at the grocery store...

Grocery shopping is one of my least favorite things to do alone.  Depending on the length of the shopping list, and the day of the week it can be a small nightmare! Thank goodness my honey doesn't blink twice about sharing in that responsibility and often offers to swing by to pick up a few items for dinner when I am working late or even offers to go do the full shopping on his own  when he has a day off during the week.

Usually this chore is a tag team event and I love it!  We save a lot of time by taking turns waiting at the deli counter while the other takes the shopping cart/list and moves along.  If an aisle is crowded and we only need one item from it, one moves on to the next aisle while the other dives in to search and retrieve, having an easier time maneuvering thru the crowd.

The small one is my husband's lunch bag.
There is one thing I do like about grocery shopping and that is to use our own bags.  Most of us do our best to be somewhat conscious of recycling and try not to use so many little plastic bags.  Practically every grocery store chain in town these days sells reusable bags with their logo printed on it.  We had a few from our local grocery store, but the materials they offer retain odors, can only be wiped down and can never be fully washed.  We needed something better; I ran into these bags on a website a year or two ago and fell in love with them! They offer a variety of sizes, prints and most can hold up to 50 pounds!

Fold so small...
They are washable, fold down to a size that fits in practically any purse (no taking them along and realizing at check out you left them in the car) and they weigh practically nothing!  We own several colors and have given them as gifts a few times.  Here is where you can find them: Rume bags, and no, I am not getting paid for this.  Just thought I'd share another option from the smelly store bags or the durable but bulky canvas totes you may own.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

The holiday season has passed but here is how it plays..

Now that I've shared my family tradition of always running a little late, I will tell you about the differences in holiday traditions my husband and I now share.  These differences drive us a little crazy because at age 40-something we have lived with them for so long and now having to compromise has been a bit uncomfortable.

On his side of the family, there is ALL DAY football on Thanksgiving day. On top of that we eat our holiday feast for lunch instead of dinner. Which means you have to get up early and start the cooking before you even get the coffee maker going! Last year I was still half a sleep when I was trying to calculate when to put the bird in the oven and let me tell you, it is embarrasing when you do accounting for a living to have your father-in-law point out you can't do simple math. 

There is no dressing up for a full day of sitting in front of the T.V. watching, pro-football and college football (and if there was peewee football being aired on that day we would be watching it as well!).  Football is only interrupted for digging in to the leftovers and the cat naps induced by the turkey feasting.

On my side of the family we have Thanksgiving DINNER.  Usually after 6 p.m.(ok, more like 7 since a few of us show up late) which means you can sleep in, have breakfast, take a shower and then get the prepping and the cooking going.  There is little or NO football.  Family comes, (the older folk still dress up for the occassion) eats and actually interacts over desert or a good old fashioned game of LOTERIA. (For the newer generations Loteria has been replaced by UNO). Our stuffing or dressing is BEEF not cornbread . (I've been told if it's not cooked in the bird it isn't STUFfing.)

Christmas!  On my husband's side of the family we gather with friends Christmas Eve.  We open presents Christmas morning after having stayed up late putting together toys for the kids.  You then have to rush thru your morning getting yourself together before you get in the kitchen to cook for a Christmas meal. Again, usually LUNCH!  You later gather with extended family not present for the Christmas lunch, and though you are thrilled to visit you can hardly keep your eyes open from the late night, early morning and big lunch! Mean while you have leftovers that will sit in the fridge or freezer until they are unrecognizable and end up making your sick or making you feel guilty for tossing them!

Christmas on my side of the family means shopping for those last minute gifts Christmas Eve because of the usual late announcements of EXTENDED family visiting for the holiday and though you are happy to skip buying a gift for the adults, you just don't want to ignore the additional kids.  So, after that mad dash, we gather for dinner at someones house for our Christmas celebration!  We eat, we drink, sometimes dance or watch a movie, we try to stay up until midnight (try, because the older we get the harder it is!).  We open gifts after midnight. Yes, midnight!! Because SANTACLOS (no misspelling) is still pretty new to us.  It is a "northern" tradition adopted in Mexico.  In Mexico children get holiday gifts in early January from LOS REYES , The Kings, or "Three Wise Men" for those who are Catholic. 

Christmas day we get up really late, play with our new toys, have leftover tamales or empanadas for breakfast and then go visit extended family or friends.  There is no cooking all day long, only heating up leftovers which usually only last a day or two instead of a week in a fridge. Though you may have a fridge full of food brought back from your family member who hosted dinner the night before or if you hosted it what you couldn't make people take home; because everyone brought over at least one dish that would feed a large portion of it to every single breathing organism present in the house! With the large number of "tios" and "primos" visiting all leftovers disappear quickly! (my husband hates this)

So as another year gets on the way and my husband and I begin to plan where we'll spend our next family holiday (Easter, Mother's Day, etc..) I am thankful my procrastination in posting this blog allows me to wish you a great non-family obligated holiday!  Happy Superbowl!  May your favorite team win, and may the commercials and half time entertainment help those of you who don't sleep and breathe football bear watching the game.